Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.

“No, this is not the beginning of a new chapter in my life; this is the beginning of a new book! That first book is already closed, ended, and tossed into the seas; this new book is newly opened, has just begun! Look, it is the first page! And it is a beautiful one!”
― C. JoyBell C.

The past few years have been a serious growing experience for me.  I have learned a lot, cried a lot, laughed a lot, worked out a lot, ate a lot, and loved a lot.  And although I swore last year I was going to continue documenting my health & wellness journey, I felt short of this goal.  I couldn't keep up with everything going on in my life and if I wasn't going to give writing my everything, I couldn't commit.  I didn't want to write only about what I ate, or only about what workout I did, or only about the funny thing my cat did when she chased the laser toy. 

But with this year, I have realized how much I have grown and how much I have to share.  So my new book begins today and I hope you are ready to join me as I write the next few chapters!

"Do not wait until the conditions are perfect to begin. Beginning makes the conditions perfect." -Alan Cohen

I guess I should begin where I want my new journey to begin...and that is with this - I have enrolled at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition.  My classes begin March 21st and I could not be more excited.  I began receiving information on the online school 2 years ago, but something kept me from signing up.  Whether that was timing, finances or passion I'm not sure, but this time I knew with my whole heart that the life I wanted for myself could only be created by me.  So I am headed back to school in 2 weeks to nourish my mind, my body and my soul.  At the end of the 1 year course, I will be a certified health coach.  Ask me what I want to do with that and I will tell you right now that I have no idea.  But I want to help people.  I want to guide people on their health & wellness journey and be a support system.  I want to motivate people to never give up and to understand that by eating the right foods, finding balance in our jobs, exercise and relationships, they will become the healthiest version of themselves.  Change is possible and I want to help people find their change!

I guess that leads me to the second part of my new beginning...for right now, I am no longer hyperthyroid with a diagnosis of Graves Disease.  My personal health & wellness journey began 3 years ago when my bloodwork showed that my thyroid was not functioning.  My TSH was 0.007.  Every endocrinologist that I sought for help told me that the only way to cure this disease was to remove my thyroid and then take thyroid replacement hormones for the rest of my life.  At the age of 25 I couldn't see myself as taking a pill every day that would act as my thyroid and I knew that I wanted to reverse my diagnosis through holistic wellness.  I sought the help of holistic and osteopathic medicine, kinesiology, acupuncture, herbal supplements, essential oils and whole foods and worked really hard to live a clean and well balanced life. 

For 3 years my blood tests still showed that my thyroid was hyperthyroid and I began to get discouraged.  How could I throw my entire heart and soul into living a healthy lifestyle without seeing the results? I wanted to breakdown; some nights I cried, some days I laughed, but I wasn't feeling like myself and I missed feeling normal.  I missed having energy, I missed not being overweight even when I watched everything I ate, I was tired of being tired. 

But last week, my blood tests came back; my TSH was 3.73 (normal range being 1-4), the mercury in my blood was completely gone and the mercury in my urine had decreased by 10, my TSI was 66 (down from 277), and my lose of bone had slowed down and now I was generating bone faster than I was losing it.  Just seeing these changes on paper made me realize how much I have changed in the past year. 

I still have a lot to work on, mainly my adrenal fatigue caused by stress and my leaky gut.  My digestion is still off - some days I feel great, other days I wake up feeling bloated and puffy.  And I can't seem to figure out what the triggers are - except most likely stress! Hopefully by enrolling in school and finding my passion in holistic health & wellness, my stress will decrease.

When I finished my lost Whole30 that I posted about in 2014 I was happy with my weight and size.  But in 2015, I lost complete control of my body.  I had gained 15 pounds and had no energy or motivation to work out. I was eating paleo, but was allowing myself too many sugary treats or gluten free entrees, too many nuts, too much fruit, and not enough self control.  I became depressed, I wasn't happy with the person I had become, not because of my weight gain, but because I wasn't happy.  I had been working so hard and was giving up.  But if I gave up on myself, no one would help me back up. I had to help myself. 

So with the beginning of 2016, I got back to my Whole30 lifestyle with limited to no added sugar, no after dinner snacking, barre workouts, spin classes and allowed myself to be happy. I spent time with my husband, my dog (oh yeah, Haley passed away last March - also when I saw a big spike in my weight), and my friends.  Since then, I have lost 10 pounds so my clothes are fitting again - I get to go shopping in my closet and just the other day I looked at all of my clothes and exclaimed "damn, I have too many clothes."  But last year I only had 2 or 3 outfits that I wore all the time with my larger, stretchier leggings because it's all I could fit in to. 

My body has changed, my mind has changed and my passion has changed.  I have seen how dedication, passion and hard work can pay off and I shouldn't doubt myself again.  I have seen what happens when I doubt myself and I don't want to go back to that person.  I choose to be happy and I choose to be me.

So with all of these positive changes, I have realized that I can positively influence others.  Which is why I have chosen to pursue a career as a health coach.  IIN is going to help save me.  It is going to push me in a direction that I never thought I would be working towards - who knew the girl smoking a pack of cigarettes a day, drinking from sun-up to sun-down, and never working out ever would be going to school for health & wellness.  I wouldn't have believed it if you told me this last year when I was at my lowest.  But here I am.

So welcome to my new journey and I look forward to this ride we are going to embark on together!

A New Year...A New Me...

I think that's what I titled my first post last year when I began writing, but I guess it's fitting for my first post in over 6 months. I stopped writing because I needed to find myself and not just write what I was doing and where I was going. But people kept looking to my writing for inspiration for health and wellness and I think it's time to pick up writing again.

As I write this, I am on Day 6 of my fourth (maybe third) Whole30. A lot has changed since my last Whole30 in May. After I completed the Whole30 in may, I went to Puerto Rico with Ryan for a much needed vacation and indulged on tostones, mofongo, yucca rice/beans, tortillas and dessert. But because I had just completed a Whole30, my health, my weight and my happiness was at an all time high so I enjoyed the food, the location and the rest and relaxation. We were extremely active on this vacation - we hiked at El Yunque Rainforest and went swimming in the waterfall, went kayaking on the bioluminescent bay at night, walked all over Old San Juan, went stand-up paddle-boarding and snorkeling and jet-skiing and swam every morning in the ocean.

After we returned, I did a Whole15 in August before we left for a trip to San Francisco. There I really indulged....crab sandwiches, peanut butter ice cream, clam chowder soup, garlic fries, basically everything that wasn't paleo. When I was on the trip, I was upset with myself for letting myself eat this way...I was bloated, red in the face and sad. But looking back now that I have had the time to think about it, I am so glad that I enjoyed the food while on vacation. It was a once in a lifetime trip with my husband and I shouldn't look back and wish that I had eaten something. All that I can do is do my best to prepare for events like this and then enjoy whatever situation I am in because it may never happen again. We were active on this trip too - walking up all this hills in San Francisco is the best booty workout ever! We also went hiking in Muir Woods and went on a 10 mile bike ride from San Francisco to Sausalito! And we're New Yorkers so we walked a lot except when we took the old fashioned trolleys! I did 2 Bar Method classes, one with the founder, Burr Leonard and my first ever Soul Cycle class.

 

After San Francisco I did a quick Whole7 to restart my healthy eating habits (see why I am on round four, but really I never did a complete round 3). Ryan and I have been eating completely Paleo since his first Whole30 in May. Both of us are so happy with this transition in lifestyle - we are so much happier, healthier and aware of the foods we are feeding our bodies. His transformation has also been amazing to watch because his workouts at the gym have been so much more efficient and his body has completely transformed.


The biggest thing that we did in October was Tough Mudder! I still cannot believe that I signed up for Tough Mudder but even more unbelievable is that I did it. I guess because I didn't think about it or train (which I do not recommend), I wasn't able to really think about what I was getting myself in to. But on a cold, windy and rainy Saturday morning in October, Ryan, my brother and his friend and I ran 13 miles and completed 22 obstacles together. We ran as a team, we completed every obstacle as a team, we worked together as a team and as a Tough Mudder team helping other individuals complete the course. We ran through mud, swam in an ice bath, jumped 12 feet off a plank, ran up a half pike, and ran through 100,000 volts of electricity...and we got a headband and a tshirt at the end to prove we did it. I had never done anything like this before and probably never will again but I have never been so proud of myself and my family for helping me complete the course. Of course I couldn't walk for 3 days after but it was worth it!

 

 

 

 

   

 

For Thanksgiving, my mom cooked a completely paleo meal which was so incredible to see how our family has completely embraced the new lifestyle and healthy eating habits. The only thing I did indulge on was the chocolate coconut cookies that I can never have just 1 of (I can't even have only 3). I did Bar Method Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday so even though I felt a little sick after eating so much, I made sure not to fall into a rut and let one cookie (okay, maybe 9) ruin my weekend. I could have sat on the couch and said "well, I ate 9 cookies yesterday, so might as well eat 9 more today," but I didn't and that is one of the harder parts of this journey. My only issue - Foldover the day after Thanksgiving for the second year in a row...really...you want me to go parallel to the floor after one of the biggest food holidays of the year? You must be crazy! Thanksgiving morning my brother and I did a 60 minute Turkey Burn Ride at Peloton.

After Thanksgiving, we kept up the Paleo lifestyle and I even stepped up my workout routine. Still doing Bar Method 4 days a week, I added in a lot of spin classes. I joined classpass which allows me to go to unlimited classes at select boutiques in NYC for the low price of $99! I love it. Swerve Fitness and Peloton have easily become my new fitness addiction. Only problem with spin, the amount of showering I have to do and I am running out of workout clothes each week but with the added fitness classes, I can't afford new clothes right now. Both Swerve and Peloton have an amazing team aspect to spinning which I never thought I would enjoy but I have become obsessed with. I hated spinning, never enjoyed being yelled out to bike on a stationary bike - where are we going? What hill do you see me going up? And why do you want me to add more resistance when my legs are barely moving anyway? And weights? You want me to lift weights and bike at the same time? This is ridiculous. But Peloton and Swerve have me going at least twice a week in addition to Bar Method. My whole family loves Swerve too - my brother goes to Swerve most weekends and Ryan comes with me to Peloton. If I can't get him into a Bar class then at least I can get him on a bike. I even got a few 1st places at Swerve which is so exciting

Christmas vacation was a little tough. I had off from December 24 - January 5 so I knew I wanted to workout every day but the food became hard to handle. Christmas Eve my family made dinner and everything was paleo except for the popovers and dessert. Well I indulged. Christmas Eve Ryan and I had our first Jewmas so after an amazing Peloton ride, we had donuts and my first bagel in over a year. It was from Essa-Bagel so it was special to me...when I was younger, my mom would wake me and my brother up every Christmas morning at 5am and take us to the Rockefeller Christmas Tree. It was dark outside and the streets were quiet and empty. After the sun started to rise we would go to Essa-Bagel and get the first batch of bagels hot and fresh out of the oven. So this year I introduced Ryan to that family tradition (there was a tree in the Peloton studio so that counts). After breakfast we went to see a movie and got popcorn with raisenettes (you pour the raisenettes into the bag of popcorn so the chocolate melts)! Dinner was Chinese Food (what else would you even think to eat during a JewMas). We got dumpling, egg rolls, pork buns, scallion pancakes, spicy beef and chow mein. And now, we're not done there...we had chocolate peanut butter Ben & Jerry's at home for dessert.

Well I paid for this meal the next day. I couldn't get off the couch. Every muscle ached, I was so tired that I couldn't keep my eyes open and I had a terrible headache. I ate completely Whole30 that day (when I was not napping). I made it to a spin class that morning but didn't leave the couch the rest of the day. Talk about a Carb Hangover.

The rest of the vacation we ate very clean except every night we had a Paleo dessert. My favorite was chocolate molten lava cake with almond butter crunch topping.

Tuesday December 30th I began my day with a 60 minute Dream Ride at Peloton. The class was focused on setting intentions for 2015 and less about resistance and how hard we were working. There was a percussionist in the room and the studio was lit by candles and the music was very motivational. I found myself crying, releasing 2014 and every worry and doubt I was holding on to and feeling lighter and happier. We filled out intention cards with I WILL, I CAN, I AM and I DO. It was a great way to end the year!

That same night I went to dinner with my girl friends at The Nomad. It was a special meal to share with my best friends because this is the hotel where Ryan and I stayed when we got married and the same owner of Eleven Madison where we had our wedding dinner. I indulged in the best food I had ever eaten and the best dessert. It was a very special night and I couldn't have been happier.

New Years Eve was like Christmas...donuts from DOUGH, Essa Bagel, a salad for lunch and pizza and ice cream for dinner. Ryan and I went to Comic Strip Live for a comedy show and came back and ordered in pizza and had Ben & Jerry's Milk and Cookies ice cream and a glass of sparkling cider. As soon as the ball dropped, we were in bed.

My workout schedule for the 11 day vacation was:

December 24: 6:30am Bar Method
December 25: 9:30am Peloton
December 26: 9:30am FlyWheel
December 27: 10:30am Swerve
December 28: 8:30am Bar Method and 10:30am Swerve
December 29: 10:30am Bar Method and 12:30pm Swerve
December 30: 9:30am Bar Method
December 31: 12:30pm Peloton
January 1: Carb Hangover
January 2: 12:30pm Peloton and 5:00pm Bar Method
January 3: 8:30am Bar Method
January 4: Rest Day
January 5: 6:30am Bar Method and 6:30pm Revolve Spin

January 1 was the start of our Whole30. We are doing it together with a lot of people from around the world. It is the largest site wide Whole30 and I feel excited to be a part of it. It isn't about completing 30 days for me because I eat very clean and have learned so much from my past whole30's but right now it is about resetting my habits. I hate needing dessert after dinner, or not being able to go without craving pizza and ice cream since I had it so often in the past 2 weeks. I eat well, I workout, but I need to recognize the habits I created after finishing Whole30 and how I have gone back to my old routines. I am on day 6 now and already have more energy and focus than I did during Christmas break.

I am so glad I pushed myself last week for double workouts and know that without those double days, my eating habits would have been worse. I gained some weight and I am aware of it, but I look back on the 11 day vacation and know that I had an amazing time with Ryan, with my friends and lived the final days of the year to the fullest.

Yesterday was the first day back at work, the first day that I woke up at 5am for Bar Method in over a week and a half but I am ready to get back to a routine, get back to my healthy eating and workout habits. I just miss the time I spent with Ryan and my friends - I feel trapped in my routine of working out early and then spending 8-9 hours at work and working out in the evening. It's hard to balance it all but that's part of the journey.

I look forward to writing again and seeing where this journey takes me!

Whole30 Round 2 Day 10 - 12

Memorial Day Weekend is my favorite holiday to spend in NYC. The city empties out because everyone is going to the beach - the streets are empty and quiet and everything seems so peaceful. I was walking along St. Marks Street Saturday morning and I was the only one on the block. Nobody was in my way; my pace was slow, my head was up, and I was smiling while I walk. It's rare, but it was a moment that I had to myself to enjoy the city!

Saturday morning began with a wonderful and filling meal 1. Leftover chocolate chili with fried eggs and brussel sprouts. Ryan said it basically looked like last nights dinner! Which it was.

I was so full from breakfast that I didn't even need a pre-workout meal before I headed to SoHo to take my Level 2 Bar Method class. I am always nervous when I go into the studio for Level 2. It's all mental though. I have been taking class for over 4 years, that's over 530 classes, I know what I am doing. But Level 2 is a bit intimidating all on its own because you have to be on your game - you have to know how to set up, how to adjust yourself and how to push yourself harder than you ever would. But Amanda's class was incredible and I am so glad I went. I am so glad I made going to a Level 2 class one of my Whole30 goals because it pushed me to go to the afternoon class and work my glutes off! I was shaking and crying on the inside but I left the studio feeling so strong.

After class I walked to Hu Kitchen to get lunch and Ryan and I sat outside at the park and ate. We got the vegetable pasta salad and fish sticks. All in all a good meal - we really didn't want meat since we were so full from chili two meals in a row. We spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing and watching TV and Ryan studied for the GRE's. This is basically how the rest of our summer will be!

Meal 3 was absolutely delicious. We made spaghetti squash with pesto (Trader Joe's is Whole30 approved) and steamed clams. It was a summer treat and reminded me of my dad's pasta vongele that he makes in Fire Island all the time. I found out later that my parents made the same dish, just without the pesto, while they were at the beach! Ryan and I rented a movie and got comfortable on the couch for the rest of the evening!

Sunday we woke up really early - 6am early. We needed to eat Meal 1 and get ready to head to the Statue of Liberty! Meal 1 was a spinach and tomato omelet with chorizo. I found sugar free chorizo at a grocery store near our house and I guess it is going to be bought weekly because Ryan proclaimed it's his favorite!!

We headed down to Battery Park to catch the boat and by 9am and were at Liberty State Park. We climbed the 357 stairs to the crown - it was a difficult steep climb, but the views were absolutely beautiful! We walked around the statue taking in the gorgeous views and sights and then got back on the boat to go to Ellis Island. It was only 10am still and we felt like we had already done so much! We got to Ellis Island and walked around the rooms where immigrants came when trying to enter the United States. We also went to the Wall of Honor and I found my family member, Samuel David Chriss, who passed through Ellis Island! By 11am we were back on the ferry and back in the city.

 

 

 

Stairway to the crown!

 

 

Inside the crown!

 

We were starving before noon since we had meal 1 so early but we held strong and did not have our emergency RxBars. We walked from Battery Park to SoHo and ended up at Dos Caminos for lunch. We were seated and looked over the menu and knew that with Mexican Cuisine we would have to do some substitutions and eliminations to make it Whole30 approved - we just didn't realize how difficult some kitchens could be. First we asked if the tacos could be turned into salads - Ryan wanted fish tacos and I wanted carnitas. We were told absolutely no, the kitchen was really strict about that. Strict about what? Taking the same meat and serving it over a plate of lettuce and saving the tacos? Hmmm. Okay. So then we both ordered the cobb salad; I had mine with grilled shrimp and Ryan had his with grilled chicken. We told the waiter, no corn, no tortilla strips, no beans, no cheese. He looked at us after we ordered and laughed and said "I see you guys are on a diet." I said "actually no, we just can't physically eat those items." We also put in an order for guacamole and told him to hold the tortilla chips (free) and send over a plate of crunchy vegetables ($5). Well, we got 6 vegetables for an entire bowl of guacamole and paid for it in comparison to the free bottomless bowl of chips. The food came out and although it looked delicious, it looked so plain. I guess that's what happens when you eliminate everything from the plate. I was just surprised that the kitchen didn't think to add more lettuce or vegetables since we didn't get anything else! Then I got mad - the waiter came over with a plate of rice, beans and cheese and said: "In case you change your mind!" In case I change my mind about what? About not wanted my stomach to hurt after I eat it, not wanting my acne to come back, not wanting to feel tired and run down? And even if I was on a diet like he thought I was, that was rude to put a plate of fattening cheese beans and rice in front of people who specifically asked for those items to be removed from the dish. Just because I didn't want it in my salad, doesn't mean I want it on my table! So for a bowl of guacamole, vegetables and 2 salads, we paid $70. Yeah, not ideal! But we didn't let it ruin our perfect day so we walked home through the park and enjoyed the beautiful weather!

We hung out on the couch when we got home at 2pm. It honestly felt like 5pm with all that we had done. We knew meal 3 would have to be early so Ryan and I split half an RxBar at 3:30pm. Not the best thing to eat, but obviously lunch wasn't that filling. Dinner was French Seasoned Lamb Ribs from Trader Joe's which I served with a side of zoodles topped with curry sweet potatoes from Hu Kitchen (apricots, almonds, potatoes, egg, apple cider vinegar) and prosciutto wrapped dates. Everything was delicious, but everything was very sweet. Ryan couldn't even finish his potatoes or dates because they were too sweet for him. What a difference 11 days make! After dinner, Ryan studied for the GRE's and I fell asleep early. I was so worn out and tired. The next morning Ryan admitted to having a late night snack of a frozen monkey muffin (banana, cashew, pecan, walnut, dates). He said the sugar rush from dinner made it so he craved more. I totally believe him and understand the hunger he felt, because, to be honest, I snuck one too when he was in the shower! It really must have been the sweet flavors that blocked the satiety from the fat of the lamb so we never got full. And also our early morning start and early lunch and early dinner didn't help either. But it was 1 day with a snack and with the amount of walking we did earlier, it's okay! We can't be too hard on ourselves. We didn't cheat or mess up Whole30.

Yesterday we had the day off from work so I went to Trader Joe's early to get some groceries for the week. I didn't get much because it is a short work week and I am off Friday and Friday night we are at the Yankee game. It was probably the least amount of money I ever spent on groceries for the week so we will see how long it lasts. Meal 1 was another spinach and tomato omelete with chorizo. We then went to Stuyvesant Oval to lay out and read for a little bit and then came back for Meal 2. Meal 2 was a tuna salad made with broccoli slaw and vegetables and Tessamae's lemon garlic dressing. We served it on top of romaine lettuce so it was like a taco (hmm, Dos Caminos should try that) and a small side of chocolate chili.

We then walked to SoHo and went to see "Fed Up," the new documentary about sugar and obesity in our society. It was so eye opening to see how the food industry is controlling our government and in turn controls us. Good thing we are doing Whole30 or this movie would have made us feel bad about ourselves. In one segment, it discussed what the recommended amount of sugar is (less than 6 tsp) and then should a typical day for most people who think they are eating healthy. A bowl of cereal with milk and OJ in the morning already has more than 6 tsp of sugar! Followed by a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch, nutella for a snack and whole wheat pasta with sauce for dinner. All of this put people over 10x the recommended amount of sugar. And this was Ryan's typical healthy diet only 12 days ago! It also showed people "dieting" and using low fat, reduced fat and no fat products and diet food products like special k, weight watchers and lean cuisine and yet their weight actually increased the more they ate the diet foods. That's because it is all processed and not real food!

After the movie we walked home and Ryan went straight for the kitchen. He told me that he was going to make dinner tonight and I was instructed to stay out of the kitchen! Lucky me!

Dinner was incredible. Beyond perfect and I am so impressed and proud to see Ryan cooking whole30 approved meals that are so good for us! He made spicy almond encrusted chicken tenders (they had a great spice and kick to them), spaghetti squash with mixed vegetable salad (we made an extra spaghetti squash on Saturday since they take awhile to cook - so great to have this on hand to use) and bok choy in garlic. It was such a perfect dinner and we had no leftovers - which made me sad because I am craving chicken tenders right now.
 

I just have to remember to lessen my portion sizes. I feel like Ryan and I are eating the same amount of food which is not good. I am so much smaller than him and he needs more food for more energy so I need to watch how much I am eating with each meal. It's just so much easy to split everything half and half but I know I can't do that. Maybe that's also why Ryan is hungry sooner than me, because he is eating less than he should be. He served dinner 50/50 last night and of course I ate it because it was on my plate, but I probably should have had 2 chicken tenders and he should of had 6 instead of 4 and 4. Oh well, good thing I had 4 because they were really good!

It was a fabulous weekend and I feel relaxed and happy! I am also extremely sore and achy from all of the walking we did this weekend but it felt good to be outside and in the sun and enjoying the nice warm weather! It makes me so happy and in such a good mood!

I hope everyone had a fabulous weekend as well!
XO